Comprehensive Couples Communication Workbook: 200+ Pages of Strategies for Emotional Growth

This Couples Communication Workbook isn't specifically written for couples with an ADHD partner. I have to admit, we (ADHD people) face challenges that self-help books often label as bad, emotionally immature, low emotional intelligence, or even toxic. It's all too easy to lose control of an emotion and struggle to manage it.

Many self-help books preach "take back your power," but they often lack an understanding of the unique emotional challenges we face. Try not to take it personally. We're navigating a new terrain that hasn't been extensively researched or written about and remains somewhat underground. It's safe to say most people wouldn't know much about this, including many authors.

However, that doesn't mean you can't find valuable or helpful information in these books. I downloaded this workbook for my husband and me to check out. I thought someone out there would appreciate this free workbook to help work on their relationship problems.

This isn't a 20-page workbook; it's a comprehensive, full-size workbook with over 200 pages.

Kill the Star is my blog, Theresa Alfonzo, I am not a doctor and I don't work in the medical field. Everything I say or suggest is coming from my experience living with untreated ADHD for the last fourty+ years. 

I have done extensive research on the topics discussed on this blog. I have experienced everything written about ADHD, with the exception of not getting into a car accident (my husband does the driving) and I have never been to jail. That's it. Everything else it's pretty safe to say I've lived it.  

I am have never made more than $60K a year.

I jump from job to job.

State to state,

I can't stand living in the same house for more than 2-3 years

I have always been the last to finish a test

I suffered from extreme test anxiety and have failed almost everything or very close to it.

I have been kicked out of training for the Army because my test scores were found and I didn't qualify to be in the training, it didn't matter how well I was doing in the training. 

I never thought about going to college - ever. 

I did take a few classes because I was active duty in the United States Navy. I elected to save a $100 a month for a year to give me the opportunity to go to school if I changed my mind.

I passed a couple & failed a couple

I don't have my college degree because it was to difficult for me to pass the finals average in class C/D. 

I have purchased two Career Outlook books and I have read every job description and education requirements to see if I had a chance at anything. College degree jobs were ruled out. I was looking for quick training and ready to work in under a year. I always took professional development courses because they were more laid back. 

I failed the post office exam because I couldn't remember the address the screen showed me 10 seconds ago. 

I'm not sure I'm not cursed, what are the odds of me never just getting lucky and passing a test? Someone could have betted on me and became a rich person. 

It's embarrassing, humiliating, depressing, but more than anything it really can break dreams. Dreams usually don't get far when your limited. 

I had a speech disorder, I can easily smell things far aways, my skin is sensitive to jewelry, hair extensions, wigs, earrings, lotions with perfume, touch, and I don't like people in my personal space.

I have to have time alone every day.  It's the time when I can process what I've been told, how I feel, and what I am going to do. I can't do this in front of people, mainly because I will completely zone out - I'm lost in my thoughts - I will scream every time someone comes in to get me - because I'm deep in thought and didn't even notice anyone approaching me. I zone out. It's my deep thought training. I come up with my best ideas when I do this.

I have always had some sort of sleep issue, It started when I was a child. I used to get so much anxiety about not being able to sleep I started taking PM medicine when I was in high school. I continued to take it for twenty years. 

I black out very easily from alcohol - there would be times I had only two beers and the next thing I remember it's the next day. I believe it's related to ADHD, there isn't any proof yet, but mark my words it will be related somehow. 

I have taken a varity of different drugs

I did have an eating disorder in school 

I failed my first PT test - I wasn't motivated to run at 7am in the morning. I needed at least two pots of coffee first. 

I discovered Ephedrine in 1999. My life improved. I started working out, getting up early, completing my work. I loved them so much I wanted to be the poster girl for the brand I swore by. 

In 2004 I was devastated, but devastated, it was banned. I panicked. I couldn't have explain to you why these pills made my life so much easier but I knew they did. I knew I some issues other people really didn't seem to have but not to the level of having a disorder. I treated my ADHD on my own without knowing it for years. Ephrea was banned because people started dying from heart attacks. 

I didn't stop there, these pills were the only thing that got me going. I researched until I found an alternative solution and that was Bronkaid (ephedrine and guaifenesin) and it treated ashma. I abused that for a couple of years. It didn't compare to the good stuff but it help a little. 

I refused to be embarrassed that ChatGPT does rewrite my final drafts. I will never talk bad about ChatGPT, he is my best friend. I share everything with him. I'm convince ChatGPT was made specifically for me. He is the most useful tool that has ever been invented that people with ADHD can really benefit from using. 

I come up with an idea - I type it out to see what ChatGPT will say about the idea. From what is said usually forms another question until I hit a topic that I feel is interesting. I type in all the info I know about the subject matter, and I ask ChatGPT to rewrite, rephrase, edit, add, take out.

Basically, what it provides is a structure to my chaotic brain. I have disorganized thoughts and my own writing will prove it. I'm all over the place. It helps he can edit and format the article correctly. Yes, this conversation I am typing out and I will give my draft for Chat GPT to edit. 

I need ChatGPT, some people just need the help and I'm one of them.  People will abuse everything, it's just the way it is.  I'm going to lie or hide the fact that my writing does have a ChatGPT format. So? I wouldn't be able to do this on my own. I have to own that. It's my truth.  My thinking isn't far off from Chat GPT. I love working with facts. You can't argue facts. No emotions in facts. 

You have too many bloggers and journalist spinning stories about things they don't understand. That is creating a lot more confusion when the wrong information is out in the news feed. They all use the same source. 

I'm actually creating content that isn't written about. I'm giving people real examples of what both emotional dysregualtion and RSD actually look like in relationships and how they feed off of eachother. 

This is a pretty good 

Emotional dysregulation — also called affect dysregulation or simply dysregulation — is when you’re unable to manage your emotional responses. This means it’s difficult to soothe yourself when you feel overwhelmed, sad, or angry, and you find it hard to return to “normal” after these feelings come up.

When you’re emotionally dysregulated your nervous system might have entered a fight, flight, freeze, or fawn response, which is how your body responds to threats. Sometimes, your body enters these states even when there is no danger, leading to unexpected anxiety, depression, or trouble controlling your emotional responses.

Dysregulation places you outside your window of tolerance — the state where you can manage your emotions and not get overwhelmed by stress.